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Empower, Connect and Support all East Tennessee lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, intersex, asexual (LGBTQ+) people
Empower, Connect and Support all East Tennessee lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, intersex, asexual (LGBTQ+) people
My name is Jacquii Cooke and I’m a 48-year-old, black trans woman from Oak Ridge, TN and currently residing in North Carolina. I’ve been here in North Carolina for a little over a year after escaping what I call “the hell of East Tennessee” back in December 2022. My mom, one of the greatest champions for my happiness and success passed away in August 2022 from a lengthy battle with COPD and congestive heart failure. Though she had 11 siblings, making our extended family quite large, the relationship I have with them is quite estranged for many reasons. After her death, my hometown and home state began almost immediately feeling less and less like home.
When I was twelve, I joined a local junior high school band, eventually making music the main focus of my studies at Oak Ridge High School (ORHS). During my senior year of high school, I accomplished quite a bit in the music arena, among other accolades named as 1st chair tubist in the All-State Tennessee band and being offered the opportunity to tour Italy as part of a choral and brass ensemble which had a personal audience with Pope John Paul II in Vatican City. That pilgrimage was my first and only experience traveling internationally thus far. My Mom always said she believed I’d be going places after that, but I doubt she thought it would take 47 years until I could realize plans to move out of Tennessee.
I feel extremely fortunate that things aligned so that I could actually make the move. The often closed-minded anti-LGBTQIA+ bias seen in politically red states, especially those in the south, is not exactly conducive to joy for 2TIGE BIPOC (Two-Spirit, Trans, Intersex, Gender-Expansive, Black, indigenous, and People of Color) individuals–the most marginalized within the larger LGBTQIA+ community. Leaving Tennessee during the height of canceling the drag artform and further demonizing the community as child-indoctrinating predators was an on-time decision until GOP proponents of that rubbish started attempting the same bogus legislation here. Otherwise, it's been one of the greatest moves I’ve made in my adult life.
Would you mind telling us about the work you have been doing for the LGBTQ+ community and why this has been important to you?
I joined the then University of Tennessee GLB Student Union in my junior year of ORHS in 1991. The students charted a bus to the 1993 March on Washington–which to this day remains one of the largest protests in American history–where an estimated one million or more people rallied on behalf of Lesbian, Gay, and Bi equal rights and liberation. That experience was the beginning of my passion for community activism and advocacy.
Most recently I created Trans Safe Space Network, an online forum/website housing insightful info & news on all-things transgender and providing a safe haven for community members to be amongst like-minded friends, family, and allies. Due to the prominence of social media platforms, both have since been disbanded, relegating a once flourishing audience to a large social media following.
I currently work with an amazing charity organization called Trans Empowerment Project (TEP). One of TEP’s most important missions is to create equitable systems of support for Disabled 2TIGE (Two-Spirit, Trans, Intersex, and Gender Expansive) individuals, especially our BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and People of Color) siblings who are often the most marginalized within the greater LGQBTQIA+ community.
In my role as Client Success Manager, my primary focus is to support TEP’s direct aid program, InTRANSitions, by actively providing support to our clients through direct aid, such as peer support, emergency food & toiletry packages, gender-affirming items, HRT funding, and more. My goal is to inevitably help the organization deepen our relationships with clients and aid our clients in moving out of spaces of crisis into empowerment. We are also planning to produce fun and exciting content for our social media channels. It will be an effort to show more Trans visibility and make the call for our community members to be accomplices for Trans joy.
The same-old-same Trans Awareness isn’t enough especially considering the state-sanctioned bigotry happening before our very eyes. The community has been intentionally targeted for a lesser quality of life by emboldened, biased, misinformed, uninformed, and unkind politicians. It’s time for Trans ACTION so that our community can thrive instead of being stuck in survival mode. This is why advocating for everyone’s equity has become my mission.
Who/what inspired you as you were growing up and what/who inspires you today?
I didn’t have much of any queer inspirations growing up as a child. 1980s East Tennessee didn’t provide much of a venue or liberties for queer people to be their most authentic selves. I was fortunate to have the support of my mother, who obviously realized I wasn’t the typical “black boy” by any stretch of the imagination. As adults, we had a few conversations about her recognizing this fact. But her support of me, along with the unconditional love of my grandmother did give me a great sense of belonging. I draw inspiration from that to this very day, fortunate that although our family was practitioners of the strict Jehovah’s Witness faith, diversity of thought and some semblance of me being free to be myself was allowed.
Would you mind sharing your coming out story?
Honestly, I was never really in the closet in the sense that many have been compelled to be. Of course, I didn’t speak very much about my attraction to males, but it was quite obvious. Instead of growing taller or having “typical” male hair growth, with voice becoming deeper voice, or any of the bulk of other secondary gender traits as my male classmates did, I literally started growing breasts during my puberty. Later in life, I would find out that I naturally had extremely high estrogen levels, with low testosterone production. So it was difficult for me not to be seen as “different” as far as sexual orientation/identity is concerned.
As I mentioned earlier, I was in the UT GLB Student Union. One day a queer friend of mine from Oliver Springs called to remind me there was a meeting and asked if I could give him a ride to it. He left a voicemail message. I was questioned about his voice, because he sounded effeminate, at which point I was asked why I was hanging out with someone like that. Long-story short, that was the catalyst that made me announce to my family that I was gay.
Later I realized that I am not a gay boy, but indeed a transgender woman. A part of my findings can be viewed on the Trans Empowerment Project website in a piece entitled Shannon and Me: How Seeing a Local Trans Icon Opened Up My Own Journey Into Visibility. The piece details how I “began my transition journey before even knowing what Transgender was.” It highlights my experience seeing Knoxville Trans and drag icon, Shannon DeVaughn, in which I say, “By simply being proudly and unashamedly visible in her authenticity, Shannon gave me the encouragement I so desperately needed as a loner teen. Her mere visibility inspired me to perform at the Carousel’s Wednesday talent night show a few weeks later.”
What advice do you have for other LGBTQ+ people out there who want to make a difference?
The sole advice I can give to other community members wanting to make a difference is simple: Get personally involved in your own liberation by becoming accomplices to each other's joy and equity, empowering our community to own its best tomorrow as it were. The right for queer freedom began 50+ years ago, and yet we as a community are still under-represented in almost every facet of American life, especially Trans BIPOC folks who remain the most marginalized even within the queer community.
Whether that involvement looks like activism and advocacy work, becoming politically engaged and running for public office, or even just making charitable contributions to organizations that are doing the real work of creating sustainable, equitable futures for our community: GET INVOLVED!
Many of our voices have been silenced or simply unheard, which should never be the case. We too matter. Our existence is as valid as anyone else’s. For any minority group to ever enjoy the pursuit of happiness as purportedly guaranteed by the U.S. Declaration of Independence from tyranny, we must establish a coalition of people willing to champion for our community. The only way to make such a thing happen is to organize in a strategic fashion, moving away from the model of simply bringing awareness to the disparities our community faces and being ACTIONABLE accomplices & allies for each other's betterment. If you are in a safe space to do such a thing, do it, get involved. If you’re in a space where safety is of concern, you can always do shadow-work, donating to organizations who are boldly leading the movement for parity. I’d be happy to connect interested people to a network of others that help establish such local empowerment within their communities.
I have always been an activist of some sort, whether it be taking up for friends who were being bullied throughout my school years, or even wearing items that were clearly labeled as feminine during my freshman-senior years in high school. Two things were instrumental for me though: joining the GLB Student Union on the Knoxville campus of the University of Tennessee and having the privilege to be among hundreds of thousands of queer people in the 1993 March on Washington.
Having been called all the derogatory names you can think of since the age of six, and basically shrugging it off as pettiness, I’ve always felt a certain calling to advocate for others; I don’t want people to feel as ostracized and treated with the intentional cruelty as I have. I also like to argue, love speaking politics and have been quite vocal most of my life. So … In short - it came naturally. Advocacy and social justice were passions of mine before I knew the definition of either term. There’s a saying that only light can defeat darkness. And while I have my dark moments–as I’m sure we all do–I do strive to be somewhat of a beacon for empowerment over being stuck in the muck of repeated mistakes. Sometimes I fail at this goal, but a lot of times I succeed.
Not that I am the sole expert in the room as concerns [sic] advising our community, but as a 48-year-old black trans woman and passionate advocate, I can offer suggestions. What I’d like to say now is not a piece of advice, but rather a thank you.
2023 saw the most anti-trans legislative agenda ever seen throughout the nation. There were attacks steeped in misinformation and disinformation, which have continued into 2024, mainly by a political party whose agenda has been to divide people along ridiculously ideological lines, in an effort to diminish the quality of life for trans people. I feel one of the most egregious attacks has been perpetrated against our younger queer community members, who feel emboldened enough to live their truths. The reason, in my opinion, is that there have been many who have come before, advocating and showing that we do not stand alone. It has allowed younger generations a certain privilege that many of the queer elders wish we could have enjoyed.
What makes me so optimistic about our community's future is that there are many parents of LGBTQIA+ youth who are supportive of their children. More than ever before, because our society is more open to diversity and progressing as a more tolerant “live and let live” society than ever before. I applaud the many parents I see embracing their children’s differences. It’s a bold act of acceptance and unconditional love that so many unfortunate people may never experience. It makes me reminisce on my childhood, ever-grateful that my single-parent black mom and most of my extended family showed me similar acceptance in the 1980s.
I had friends who were summarily tossed out of their homes into the street for simply being queer. To see such a momentum swing to counter this gives me some hope that our community can be better and exist without being in fear of simply being themselves. So I’ll take this time to applaud the parents who are doing right by their children instead of succumbing to the indoctrination of hate and unacceptance. Bravo!
The LGBTQ+ community has come under attack more than ever. How can we help?
Many may have voices they feel are silenced for whatever reason. At one point my own voice was silenced as I battled a major mental breakdown. I still battle social anxiety and bi-polar diagnosis, but thanks to the help of some fantastic medical and mental health professionals, have made a lot of progress towards winning the battle. You must speak truth to power. There seems to be an inkling of truth to many of the lies that are spread about our community. Some of the bolder, fear-mongering tactics used by homophobes, transphobes, and anyone who may not conform to societal norms are simply outrageous and steeped in disinformation. You have to speak against that, loudly so, or the lies will live in perpetuity. My truth is that I’d rather not see that happen; I’d rather dismantle lies about Trans women being predators in restrooms. That’s not true and is not backed by any fact. Lies about Trans kids being mutilated with surgical procedures and hormone replacement therapy is not backed by fact and goes contrary to the current standards of the American Medical Association. There may be some truth as far as the “debate” about Trans women in sports, but the amount of misinformation being spread is a tactic from an old playbook that once saw the perpetuation of blacks-only water fountains. That tactic, like current anti-trans tactics, could be dismantled and the truth outed. Fighting darkness with light, lies with truth and fact, is a great strategy. And I am cautiously optimistic that doing such a thing can help our community have a more prosperous day.
What positive change(s) do you think need to happen for our LGBTQ+ communities in Tennessee?
Obviously, as I’ve stated earlier, I believe our community needs to come together as one supportive unity towards the goal of helping everyone to enjoyable, equitable lives. Now that I’ve escaped what I’ve called “the hell of East Tennessee”, I can only think of one change that could make all the difference in my beautiful home state - a total and complete political regime change. Why some people do not actively vote in their best interest is beyond my realm of understanding. So yes, I believe some of the most destructive, divisive, and unrepresentative politics has been and simply is awful for the well-being of all Tennesseans.
What is the best way we can support each other in our communities, bravery, resilience, kindness, love, and compassion?
This seems like a simple answer to me actually. Another great question whose answer is likely easier said than done. I would say simply that when we lead with a level of authentic empathy towards each other's situations and show gratitude for all things for our overall personal growth, the world will be a better place. Towards this end, we must be cooperative towards the goal of not only attaining health, wealth, and wisdom for ourselves but also being willing to share it with even mere strangers. Easier said than done, I’m very sure, but it is not impossible. We have all learned and/or been taught behaviors that have not always been the greatest. Likewise, we can unlearn and develop healthier behaviors and happiness.
You can support the work Jacquii is doing at Trans Empowerment Project by making a donation, which enables us to create lasting change and opportunities for 2TIGE individuals in need of direct aid like emergency food & toiletries delivery, HRT access, and much more.
To make your charitable contribution directly to TEP’s inTRANSitions program and be a part of this transformative revolution, visit my Empower Lives: Unleash Hope & Help Fuel Direct Aid! fundraiser on Tiltify at https://tiltify.com/@msjacquiic/empower-lives.
You can also create your own fundraiser on Tiltify and share it with your trans-affirming family, friends & colleagues!
Complete directions on how to do so can be found online at https://tiltify.com/trans-empowerment-project. Let's continue making history together, one act of empowerment at a time.
For more information about Jacquii's Trans Safe Space Network, click below:
From water to death. There were witnesses, it was in a public space, in a place where adults and persons of authority were present and yet, what we have is from water to death.
This was a kiddo who was being bullied...in school.
Nex reacted to harassment by throwing water, not punches. Water, not weapons. Water, not abusive, phobic/hate-filled language. And the price of water, was their death.
It's shocking to see how this teen, who was living in a "right-to-life" country, did not, as it turns out, have a right to live. What is shameful is how Nex continues to bear the brunt of blame: "the department has since said Benedict’s death was not a result of injuries suffered in the fight, based on the preliminary results of the autopsy," "Sue Benedict, said she wanted authorities to file charges. The officer who responded can be heard in the hospital video explaining that the teen started the altercation by throwing the water and the court would view it as a mutual fight."
Water. And now death. We are kinder to people on death row than a non-binary child who was being bullied and is now dead. Nex's crime: being an alive LGBTQ+ teen among a world of politicians, legislators, and authority figures who will never feel the impact of this kind of hatred as they continue to pass and enforce the very laws that give a green light to violence, hatred, and discrimination against people who....simply have a right to live.
Learn how to protect yourself in a positive and safe environment with a queer instructor. Classes are every Friday evening @ 6:00 pm and cost $10.00. Private group instruction is also an option. For more information, class location, and what to expect, contact Jacob by text/voice: 865-469-6614.
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